Trigger Happy: How One Comment Can Ruin Your Day (And Recover)

First posted – May 6, 2025 / Revised – May 29,2025

“Sometimes, it’s not the comment that breaks you—it’s the echo it awakens inside. Healing begins when you stop laughing things off and start listening inward.”
– Julius Chan

You were doing fine. You even smiled at the barista and managed to reply to that one email you’ve been ignoring. Then bam!—someone drops a comment. It could be a passing jab, a “joke,” or even a well-meaning remark wrapped in barbed wire. And just like that, your mood swan dives into the abyss.

Welcome to the “Trigger Happy” zone, where one tiny verbal spark ignites a full-blown emotional wildfire.

But here’s the plot twist: it is not just about what was said. It is about what it hit inside you.

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Why We Spiral From Small Triggers

1. Old Wounds Wear New Costumes
   Often, these comments sneak through because they tap into something older—a childhood fear, a past rejection, or the ever-popular Impostor Syndrome Greatest Hits.
2. Brainwave Hijack
   As explained in Depression – A Self-Help Guide, our emotional triggers fire up our brainwaves like a DJ on energy drinks. A snide comment can push you from calm alpha waves into anxious beta or depressive theta waves in seconds.
3. Leaky Vessel Syndrome
   (Not a real syndrome, but it should be.) When our emotional vessel is cracked (think: burnout, depression, chronic stress), even small hits drain our energy faster. What might glance off someone else cuts deep for us.

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The Day I Laughed… and It Still Hurt

Let me share a moment I wish I could forget—but won’t.

During a professional HR course filled with participants from different industries, I was feeling pretty confident. Until, during a light-hearted group discussion, someone made a sharp comment about my baldness. A cheap shot, really. What made it worse? Everyone laughed. I did too, because that’s what you do when you want to look unbothered.

But the truth?

It stung.

I smiled on the surface, but inside, I felt exposed. As much as I told myself it didn’t matter, that it was just “banter,” something shifted. I realised—maybe for the first time—that I do care about my appearance. That behind my humor and thick skin, there’s a soft spot I don’t always admit exists.

That moment wasn’t about hair. It was about dignity, vulnerability, and how fast humor can turn into humiliation.

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What To Do When You’re Triggered

1. Name the Flame Before It Spreads
Pause. Literally say to yourself, “Okay, that stung.” Naming it helps deactivate it. Call it out like an unwelcome guest.

2. Zoom Out Emotionally
Ask: “What part of me did that comment poke?” Is it fear of not being enough? A need for validation? Dig gently.

3. Replace the Inner Commentary
Try this: “That comment wasn’t about my worth—it was about their tone, their story, or their own bad day.”
It may not erase the sting, but it gives it less space to grow.

4. Rewire with Kindness
Even if you do not believe it fully yet, say something nurturing to yourself. “I’m still trying. I’m still growing. That moment doesn’t define me.”

5. Energy Cleanse (Without Sage or a Spotify Subscription)
Step outside. Move your body. Journal. Change your environment. It does not have to be dramatic—it just has to be different.

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How I Zoomed Out Emotionally (So I Didn’t Spiral Inward)

After that moment, I could feel the emotional gears grinding. The comment kept replaying in my head like a bad TikTok trend I didn’t ask for.

Here’s what I did:

1. I Gave Myself Permission to Feel It
Instead of brushing it off with more humour (my usual go-to), I let myself admit: “That actually hurt.” No shame. No sugar-coating. Just honesty.

2. I Asked: “Why Did It Hit Me So Hard?”
I wasn’t upset just because of the bald joke. I was upset because it challenged how I see myself—especially in a professional setting where I wanted to feel confident. The laughter wasn’t rejection, but it felt like it.

3. I Reclaimed the Narrative
I reminded myself: I am not defined by one feature. I’ve weathered worse storms. That comment was one moment, not a mirror.

4. I Changed the Channel
I focused on something productive. Finished a module. Connected with someone from the course who showed respect. I shifted the emotional energy into motion—and motion always helps me feel grounded again.

Recommendation:

If this post resonates, you’ll love Depression – A Self-Help Guide. It dives deep into how energy, emotion, and everyday interactions shape our mental landscape—and how we can learn to ride the emotional waves instead of drowning in them.

It’s part memoir, part mental survival kit.

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Up Next:

“The Empath Trap: How to Stop Caring Yourself to Exhaustion”
Because being a walking emotional sponge is a superpower—until you drown in it.